1/6/11

I never built a bike before...

...but I have built a vest, which seems to be more important these days.  Having done so, I feel qualified to offer up these simple tips on how you too, can improve your tough guy image.

1. Choose a reputable vest manufacturer.  I went with Carhartt cuz it says I'm country but I might still have a bike in the barn.

2.  Collect an infinite number of patches and pins to give ur vest instant street cred.  Obscure bands are cool, as are pre-PC social statements.  Trade sum homegrown to the outta-work seamstress next door for some time on her Singer and get to work, son!



 3.  No vest is complete without AT LEAST (1) American flag patch, even if you live in Brazil.  After all, SOA comes from America so pay yer respects, prospect!

3. Ride, never rinse, repeat.  Its sacrilegious to wash yer vest or wear deorderant whilst wearing yer new 'cut'.

4 comments :

J Dizzle said...

Dog hair divides the men from the boys... know this son!

O.F. said...

Or do it the "period correct" way, go down to the local Salvation Army and get a $4.50 big E Levis dark indigo jacket, cut the sleeves off and put yer shit on the good ole fashioned way, needle and thread style.

Huber said...

If we both have Stitches and US Bombs patches does that mean we are in the same club?

Beardy Creep said...

if you wanted to make your vest truly hetero! you only needed one real patch...... Paul Jr. Designs...Paulie rulez!...in yer face!